Empathy Call Recommendations
How to Create Extremely Deep And Valuable Relationship Through Structured Conversation!
Why Try This?
We often discuss how we need more empathy in the world. This practice is an opportunity for you to receive, give, and practice empathy! What are you waiting for, my friend?
During an empathy call, you will split the time focusing on one person as the speaker with the other as the listener. After the first person's turn is complete, you switch roles. The first key is for you to commit to listening deeply when you're the listener and following the lead of what the speaker is looking for. The second key is for you to commit to being honest with what you want to share and listening to yourself internally as you are speaking.
Avoid sharing anything that will bring up conflict for you and your partner. That is for you to get empathy from a different empathy buddy and for other conflict care & resolution exercises. Feel free to reach out for those types of tools.
The Timing
Feel free to find a time that works best for you and your buddy. Here are a few of the general structures I use, by time
For 30 min calls:
5 min check-in,
10 min share from person A,
10 min from person B,
5 min debrief
60 mins:
10 min check-in (2-3 minute of quiet/settling in/meditation),
20 min share Person A,
20 min share Person B,
10 min debrief + check-out
90 mins:
15 min check-in (5 minutes settling in),
30 min Person A,
30 min Person B,
15 min debrief + check-out
More Detailed Tips & Tricks by Section
Check-in
Settling in
Do any of the following:
During your turn to speak
You are in charge! Decide what you would like to share and what kind of response you’d like. Check that your partner is willing. If your partner is unsure if they’ll be able to give what you want, maybe ask for something else OR give it a try and see how it goes. Check your own willingness as you go!
Some things you might want to ask for (and maybe a combination of these):
During your turn to listen
Focus on providing your attention and care to the other person.
If you notice you have thoughts & feelings
Remember that even if you cannot do the practice perfectly, that is ok. Your goal is to be as present as possible at this moment. However present you are able to be, your attention helps make the container for their thoughts, feelings, and needs to be expressed
Debrief
Discuss how the experience was:
Scheduling a Regular Practice
Get a Practice Partner
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